Navigating the Choppy Waters: Dealing with Entitled Individuals in the Workplace

In every workplace, there's that one person who seems to exude an air of entitlement, making collaboration and communication feel like walking on eggshells while waiting for the bomb to go off and blow up in your face, and as you read this you might even have a person coming to mind for yourself right now, entitled people are everywhere and they make communication extra hard for the rest of the team.

But, the good news is, there is a cure! Let's start at the beginning though, and meet Harley, a junior staff member who floats around the office like a queen bee in her hive, entitlement oozing out of her in every interaction.

Harley naturally strode around the office with an air of superiority, her entitlement apparent in every conversation, from her gestures and tone to her choice of words. Her inflated self-worth and grandiosity led her to believe she deserved special treatment, while her lack of empathy and understanding left colleagues feeling disregarded, undervalued and understandably frustrated.

Her lack of empathy left a trail of annoyed coworkers in her wake, as she bulldozed over their feelings and concerns with a dismissive snub, solely focused on her own agenda, without considering the impact on others. This pattern of behaviour created a palpable tension in the office, making collaboration feel like an uphill battle for those unfortunate enough to have to work with her.

Despite her outward confidence though, Harley's self-esteem was as fragile as a house of cards. The smallest criticism or challenge to her sense of self sent her spiralling into a defensive frenzy, blaming and accusing others for her shortcomings and failures.

Instead of finding a solution, Haley was constantly seeking validation, she craved attention and affirmation like a lost tourist in the desert craves water. She thrived on praise and adoration, unable to function without the constant reinforcement of her worth by others. Her insatiable thirst for validation turned her colleagues into unknowing actors in her personal version of home and away. 

Navigating the Entitlement Storm Using Mindful Communication

Dealing with entitled individuals like Harley requires a methodical approach rooted in mindful communication. Let's explore which tools of mindful communication can effectively change Harley's behaviour and prove helpful when dealing with entitled individuals like her.

Use "I" Statements: Instead of pointing fingers, express your feelings and needs using "I" statements. For example, "I feel frustrated when deadlines are missed" fosters open dialogue without triggering defensiveness. 

Practice Active Listening: Show empathy by actively listening to Harley's perspective. Reflect back her feelings and concerns to demonstrate understanding, even if you don't agree with her entitlement. 

Set Clear Expectations: Establish clear boundaries and expectations from the outset to avoid manipulation or misunderstandings. Clearly communicate what is and isn't acceptable behaviour in the workplace. 

Offer Choices: Provide Harley with options whenever possible, giving her a sense of control and autonomy within the boundaries you've set. 

Use Positive Reinforcement: Acknowledge and reward positive behaviour when Harley respects boundaries or shows consideration for others. Positive reinforcement can encourage her to continue cooperative behaviour. 

Stay Firm but Respectful: Maintain a firm stance while remaining respectful and composed in your interactions with Harley. Avoid power struggles or becoming defensive, as this can escalate conflict. 

Limit Interaction: If Harley's entitled behaviour becomes overwhelming, consider limiting your interactions with her to minimize stress and avoid unnecessary conflicts, then try again. 

Lead by Example: Demonstrate empathy, humility, and gratitude in your own behaviour, setting a positive example for others to follow, including Harley. 

Know When to Walk Away: Sometimes, despite your best efforts, dealing with entitled individuals like Harley may not be productive or healthy. Recognize when it's time to disengage and prioritize your own well-being.

Transforming Harley: Through Mindful Communication

Armed with the above tools of mindful communication, the team started to approach Harley with empathy and understanding. Instead of pointing fingers, they expressed their feelings using "I" statements, fostering open dialogue without triggering defensiveness, and keeping Harley in an emotionally safe space.

They listened actively to Harley's perspective, acknowledging her feelings and concerns, even if they didn't agree with her entitlement. Through positive reinforcement, they praised her when she respected boundaries and showed consideration for others, encouraging cooperative behaviour.

Setting clear expectations and offering choices gave Harley a sense of control and autonomy within the boundaries they established. They maintained firm but respectful stances, leading by example with empathy, humility, and gratitude in their own behaviour.

The Transformation Unfolds: After Mindful Communication

Slowly but surely, Harley's attitude began to shift. She responded positively to the empathetic approach, feeling valued and respected in the workplace. With clear expectations and boundaries in place, she understood her role and responsibilities more clearly.

As she received positive reinforcement for cooperative behaviour, Harley's need for constant validation diminished. She became more self-assured and confident, no longer relying solely on external praise to boost her self-esteem.

Through mindful communication, Harley learned to recognize and acknowledge her entitlement, paving the way for personal growth and development. She became a more considerate and collaborative team member, fostering a more harmonious work environment for everyone.

Before and After Mindful Communication

Before mindful communication, Harley's entitled behaviour created tension and conflict in the workplace, undermining productivity and morale. 

However, through the transformative power of the team using mindful communication, Harley evolved into a more self-aware and empathetic individual, contributing positively to the team dynamic.

By employing empathy, active listening, and positive reinforcement, the team was able to break through Harley's defensive barriers and foster a culture of mutual respect and understanding. Through this journey, the team learned that with patience, compassion, and mindful communication, even the most entitled individuals can undergo a profound transformation, leading to a more harmonious and fulfilling work environment for all. Remember often it is not the individual but rather the parenting or cultural environment or even psychological challenges that bring on the attitude of entitlement. 

Harley's Story with Mindful Communication

While Harley's entitlement created a stormy workplace environment, employing mindful communication techniques offered a bridge out of the chaos. 

By fostering empathy, setting clear boundaries, and leading by example, it's possible to navigate the choppy waters of dealing with entitled individuals like Harley while maintaining your own sanity and well-being.