How to avoid getting emotionally hijacked
Imagine Sarah, a seasoned marketing pro, standing before a packed hall to present her innovative marketing strategies. Confident on the surface, her amygdala had other plans.
As she began, her heart raced, and her palms turned clammy. Suddenly, her words stumbled, and the slides turned into a blur. The amygdala (her fight or flight centre) hijacking was in full swing, steering her thoughts into a storm of self-doubt and confusion. The audience saw her struggle, but also her vulnerable authenticity—the battle against public speaking fears we all face at times.
Post-presentation, Sarah embraced mindful communication. Mindful breathwork and self-awareness became her allies. Armed with mindfulness, the next time she presented her ideas she was able to turn her near amygdala hijacking into a chance for growth. Managing her state as she went through the presentions, tending to her emotions and being aware of the energy in the room. Needless to say, Sarah hit the presentation out of the park! Mindfulness isn't just a tool you see — it's a ticket to mastering the rollercoaster of emotions and owning the stage or meeting room or presentation or any other high-impact conversation.
Public speaking and managing conflicts effectively
We are all just human and public speaking and conflict situations are two scenarios that can trigger strong emotional reactions. Understanding how the mind functions and being mindful of our internal response can change the game. These mostly unconscious emotional reactions are often driven by the part of the brain called the amygdala, which is the part of the brain responsible for processing emotions, particularly fear and anxiety.
When the amygdala perceives a threat, it can lead to an "amygdala hijacking," where our rational thinking is overridden by our emotional responses. You probably have one or two memories of this happening to yourself, mostly at the most inappropriate time and place.
In this blog, we will explore how amygdala hijacking manifests in public speaking and conflict situations, its impact on communication, and how the practice of mindful communication can help prevent such hijackings - so let's get stuck into it!
Amygdala hijacking in public speaking
Public speaking is a common scenario that can activate the amygdala's fight-or-flight response. The comedian Seinfeld once said that most people would rather be in the coffin than give the eulogy. As we know, every joke has a grain of truth to it - so why do so many people opt out of public speaking opportunities?
We know that fear of judgment, criticism, or embarrassment can trigger this unconscious body response, leading to symptoms like rapid heartbeat, sweaty palms, and even a mental blank-out. For example, a person about to deliver a presentation might experience an amygdala hijack, causing them to lose their train of thought and struggle to articulate their ideas coherently. This can hinder effective communication and damage their self-confidence, and possibly their reputation and hinder their career advancement.
Amygdala hijacking in conflict situations
Conflict situations, whether they occur at work, in personal relationships, or elsewhere, can also activate the amygdala. When we feel threatened or attacked, the amygdala can hijack our emotional state, leading to impulsive reactions. For instance, during an argument, someone might become defensive, raise their voice, or even resort to personal attacks due to their amygdala being in control. You may have had this happen to you when you heard yourself say words you wish you could take back - but instead, you doubled down to the detriment of the relationship. This emotional reaction often hinders constructive communication and the resolution of the issue at hand.
Impact on communication
Amygdala hijacking in both public speaking and conflict situations can impair communication in several ways:
Impaired rational thinking: When the amygdala takes over, our ability to think logically and rationally diminishes. This can lead to incoherent speech or reactive behaviour that does not consider the bigger picture.
Reduced empathy: Emotional reactions driven by the amygdala can make it difficult to empathise with others' perspectives, leading to misunderstandings and further escalating conflicts.
Communication breakdown: In public speaking, an amygdala hijack can result in communication breakdown as the speaker struggles to convey their message effectively. In conflicts, it can lead to a cycle of escalating emotions and unproductive exchanges.
Mindful communication as a solution
Mindful communication involves being fully present, non-judgmental, and attentive during interactions. It can help prevent amygdala hijacking by:
Emotion regulation: Mindfulness techniques, such as deep breathing and grounding exercises, can help regulate emotions and prevent the amygdala from taking control.
Increased self-awareness: Mindfulness fosters self-awareness, allowing individuals to recognise the onset of an amygdala hijack and choose a more composed response.
Empathy enhancement: Mindful communication encourages active listening and empathy, reducing the likelihood of misinterpreting others' words and intentions.
Reduced reactivity: Mindful individuals are less likely to react impulsively and become more response-able, thus minimising the chances of escalating conflicts.
Examples
Public speaking: Before a presentation, Sarah practices mindful breathing to calm her nerves. As she begins speaking, she notices signs of anxiety but uses mindfulness techniques to stay present and focused, preventing an amygdala hijack and delivering a confident presentation.
Conflict resolution: During a heated discussion, one party senses their amygdala response rising. Instead of reacting emotionally, they take a mindful pause, acknowledging their emotions without being consumed by them. This enables them to respond thoughtfully and productively.
Conclusion
Amygdala hijacking in public speaking and conflict situations can hinder effective communication and escalate tensions. However, mindful communication and self-awareness offer a powerful solution by allowing you to manage your emotional responses and engage in more thoughtful interactions. By incorporating mindfulness techniques, you can navigate these situations with greater clarity, empathy, and control, leading to improved communication and conflict resolution. So the next time you feel a hijacking coming on, take a deep breath, become aware of your emotional state, and with empathy, allow yourself to let these emotions pass and come back to a grounded version of yourself with calm in your voice and steadiness in your body language.